If ever there was a time for nurses to nurture ourselves more deeply, it is now… with:
- staff shortages
- a nursing workforce with fatigue
- more complex patient presentations
- increased pressure on hospital services and
- an imbalance between home and work life
In short, our health system is in trouble and we as nurses are front row participants and observers in this crisis, feeling the pressure to pick up the pieces so that our patients’ needs are met, to care for them whatever the cost to ourselves.
However, if we do not nurture ourselves, we end up being the victims of this crisis with burnout and many nurses leaving the profession for something ‘better’.
We all know the traditional, frequently touted ways to self-care and to relieve stress such as regular exercise, eating well, getting to bed early at night, going to a movie, and all the other go to distractions which we may seek for relief at the end of a busy and possibly unrewarding day.
We are all aware of these commonly perceived ways to self-care but if not done in a loving and consistent way the benefits for our bodies in terms of nurturing are minimal. I know for myself I was ticking all these boxes but would exercise in spurts, often override the ‘you are tired’ messages from my body to go out to a movie with friends and I was eating lots of muesli bars and sweet pick-me-ups to keep me going at work. No judgment here, but was I really nurturing myself?
So what does it mean to nurture ourselves more deeply and why is this important?
Nurturing ourselves more deeply is more of an internal body experience as opposed to seeking an outside activity for relief and a release from the challenging days we may have.
We may not be able to fix the systemic breakdowns in the health system or the chaos in the areas we are working; these things are part of a very fractured global health system with more problems than we could possibly imagine. However, we can adjust, change, and deepen how WE work in the system. We don’t need to be products of its demise.
After all most of us are nursing because we love the work we do, we see the differences we make and the value we offer our patients and communities. That is truly worth coming to work for.
Nurturing ourselves more deeply starts with feeling what our bodies are communicating to us.
For example, are you feeling aches and pains in different parts of your body, experiencing indigestion regularly, is your mind working overtime with chatter, is your body feeling tired and rundown and/or are you always in a rushing mode or momentum?
These are a few ways our body is communicating with us and we have a choice as to whether we ignore these communications and maybe patch them up temporarily with a paracetamol, a gym workout, maybe a massage or we can take a stop moment to examine how we have been truly living at home and at work. Ignoring the communications or patching them up temporarily doesn’t work if the cause of them is not identified and some changes put in place.
We are a big part of that change.
We all have an inner essence which is held deeply within our bodies and is always there for us to connect to. When we connect to this place it can bring a stillness to our body and gives us space to feel what is going on within us. Some people do this through meditation, a gentle walk, being in ature, saying a prayer or when at work maybe taking a moment when you are washing your hands or even on the toilet.
When we can feel what is going on we may be able to identify the ‘why’ we may be developing these adverse body symptoms and stressors in the first place and this can give us a clue for a way to deal with them.
I can give you a practical example from my own workplace.
I work in a hospice as a nurse and it can be a very busy place. There is often heaps of emotion flying around especially if we have a complex family situation, an unsettled patient or a very young patient. As nurses, we often feel and/or react to these situations differently so each of us can be expressing a different emotion or reaction to the same situation.
Recently it has been very busy for me. I usually manage ‘busyness’ very well but I really wondered how I would manage this particular couple of days. Halfway through the day I was starting to go into a bit of overwhelm and was feeling a bit tired. I noticed I was getting a bit irritable with a staff member which was not helpful. The ‘why’ for me was that there was just too much for one person to do and in the rush to be a ‘super nurse the quality of what I was doing had dropped.
As I was standing at the photocopier waiting for something to print, I took some deep breaths and felt my body. I affirmed myself in that I could only do what was feasible for me to humanly do and that the quality of what I did was important. I remembered that I had promised a family to go and see a patient in our inpatient unit. I always find supporting patients and their families to be a very nourishing experience, so I never hesitate with these requests. I finished at the photocopier and went to the patient. The family were all in the room. The patient was now semi-conscious. I went to her, held her hand and said hello. I stood there for a few minutes and talked to her and her family as I did so. When I left the room, I felt more myself, more steady and ready to finish what I needed to do before the end of the day. In a moment being with this patient and family was a nurturing and settling experience.
I have found it supportive to have my own toolkit of ways I can nurture myself at work, such as focusing on my breath to bring myself back to my body and being fully present in my connections with others and the tasks I may be doing. I make sure I have a break… often a short walk away from my workplace to just be; ensure that I have nourishing food options at work and give myself the opportunities to talk to work colleagues I trust about issues that may be bothering me.
We all need to find ways to nurture ourselves both at work and at home, remembering that there are many things we cannot change but that we can change how we respond in any given situation.
